Confidence - St Symeon the New Theologian

One thing I've discovered in the writings of ancient monks is humility. They are unaware of us arrogant protestant critics bearing rocks. Unaware of us disrespectful charismatics who lift proof texts from their mystic teachers and put them in our books that condemn obedience. Unaware of how disgusting to us is their desperation to be saved.

The harder you try, the more desperate you get for help. That's why the monastics jettison everything they can, even good things, to live simply and pray for mercy.

I hope that in reading this, we do not allow our understanding of justification to override the Gospel; Jesus said a lot about obedience to Himself. Let me point out for example, something that shows up in our cultural blind spot: Responding to an altar-call is very much a work.

Praying a prayer with sincerity is also a work. Warding ourselves against any hint of legalism is a very difficult work, and a burden Jesus never gave us. That's something the reformers gleaned from Paul, using only half of what he said and no Gospel texts at all. Modernism hit the fan and we now have a new law of no-law and no one is lifting a finger to help us bear it. It's a deadly error to think that saving faith consists in doing nothing at all; that effort causes us to forfeit grace.  It might be that the effort to do nothing forfeits grace.

The antidote for despair is not presumption; it's desperate repentance and watching yourself grow up into Christ (Eph 4:15).

Be not deceived, my brethren. God loves mankind, He is merciful and compassionate. Of this I bear witness and this I confess, for it is by His compassion that I am confident that I will be saved. But know this, that it will be of no avail for those who are impenitent and do not keep His commandments with all exactitude and with much fear; they will be punished far more severely than the unbelieving and unbaptized heathen. Be not deceived, brethren; let not any of your offenses appear insignificant to you, nor dismiss them with contempt as though they do not greatly damage your souls. Servants who are grateful do not recognize any difference between a small offense and a great one. Even if their offense consist merely in a glance or in a thought or word, they feel about it as though they have fallen from the love of God, which I believe is true (III.7).

[…]

The deadly wound consists of every sin that is not repented and confessed, and of falling into despair. This depends on our choice and will. If we do not yield ourselves to the pit of carelessness and despair the devils cannot at all prevail over us. Even when we have been wounded, if we so wish we may through fervent penitence become more courageous and skillful fighters. To rise again and fight after being wounded and slain belongs to the noblest and bravest – it is worthy of great praise and most admirable. It does not depend on us whether we should be preserved from suffering wounds. To become either mortal or immortal depends on us, for if we do not despair we shall not die, “death will have no dominion over us” (Rom 6:9), but we shall always be strong if we flee in penitence to our all-powerful and gracious God.

Therefore I encourage myself and us all to display all eagerness, all patient courage and endurance by means of good deeds. Thus may we make our way through all the commandments and precepts of Christ, so that in readiness of soul we may attain to the eternal habitations by the guidance of the Spirit. So shall we be found worthy to stand before the one and indivisible Trinity and in Him worship Christ our God, to whom be the glory and the power forever and ever. Amen (III.10).

– St Symeon, The Discourses

Be Humble - Hesychius of Sinai

Snow can never emit flame.
Water can never issue fire.
A thorn bush can never produce a fig.
Just so, your heart can never be free
from oppressive thoughts, words, and actions
until it has purified itself internally.

Be eager to walk this path.
Watch your heart always.
Constantly say the prayer
“Lord Jesus Christ, have mercy on me.”
Be humble.
Set your soul in quietness.

The more the rain falls on the earth,
the softer it makes it;
similarly, Christ’s holy name
gladdens the earth of our heart
the more we call upon it.

— Hesychius of Sinai

	Fr. John McGuckin - Humble Prayer .mp3
	Found at bee mp3 search engine

I was praying in the bed today, lamenting the gap between Christ and me. It's no use quoting scripture at myself when my conscience condemns me.

Many people who are experienced at prayer will tell you that as soon as you commit yourself to talk to God, the accuser [spit on the ground] will remind you of every sin you've ever committed. Or is it sometimes the Holy Spirit? It's not always easy to tell. Here's the answer though, IT DOESN'T MATTER.

If it's God reminding you about your sin, repent. Call someone you love and trust (someone who agrees with God about your sin) and tell them about it. There's an incredible freedom that comes from not hiding. This freedom is, by the way, very important to the gospel (John 3:19). Necessary, in fact.

If it's the enemy, repent. Take yourself and your shame out of his hands. Call someone you love and trust (someone who agrees with God about your sin) and tell them about it. There's an incredible freedom that comes from not hiding. This freedom is, by the way, very important to the gospel (John 3:19). Necessary, in fact.

Do you see it? Our sin really does separate us from God, not because it keeps Him away, but because it keeps us away from Him. Almost no one is willing to bite the bullet of confession so that they can pray. Instead, we convince ourselves that our sin isn't a problem but we still never pray. As if there's anything else! There isn't. We were made for Him, to obey and enjoy Him forever. If we don't have that, we don't have anything. The doors of hell are locked from the inside.

So this morning I asked God to crush me and set me on fire (Luke 20:18, Luke 3:16, Luke 12:49). Sometimes I have the grace to throw myself on his mercy. Other times I can't even do that. But He is faithful to undo me and let me try again (Lam 3:22-23).

No sooner had I prayed for this, to be crushed and burned, than Isaac came toddling bleary-eyed out of his room. "I wake up! Can I have some chocolate milk please?" Oh Jesus! Your yoke is easy and your burden is light (Matt 11:30).

Thrice | The Earth Will Shake

He who sins is not free (John 8:34-36) but the Lord hears the needy and does not despise his own people who are prisoners (Psalm 69:33). Hate your slavery. Kiss the Son (Psalm 2:12).